scared?

I'm unsure of what has triggered it or why I feel this way but all of the sudden I am scared and worried about Cody deploying again. Even though it is quite a ways away it is still really close and it scares me. We got their schedule right up until it is time to leave and I guess just the thought that every thing is already planned out and we are already planning for yet another deployment scares the crap out of me. I don't know how it will actually go. Last deployment I had school every day and lived where my family was so it wasn't completely horrible yeah I missed him and was worried about him but it wasn't too bad. This time I will be all the way in california and I plan to go home for a few weeks but not moving home that's just insane. I don't know what I will do I kinda go crazy with him at work late somedays since I am here alone... Okay, I have our dog Gunner but it is still lonely. A plus this time is I have a friend who is married to a guy in cody's platoon so they will be together and we will be together. We are partners in crime. I just had to get it out that I am worried and scared and any other emotions that comes with deployment. Last time I didn't freak out until the day he left and even then I was pretty chill about it... I don't know.